Chewing Xanthan Gum

Theif's prison had no doors or windows, but its walls were pitted with keyholes. The only other thing trapped along with Theif was a cellphone, neatly placed in its little cage. A corrections officer lurked nearby.

Unsure of how to escape, Theif slid his fingers through the metal bars and began to arbitrarily press the cellphone's keys. The jangling of the keys alerted the corrections officer, who promptly rearranged the vowels of Thief's name.

Properly aligned, Thief pilfered the keys from the cellphone and turned to the keyholes honeycombing his cell's wall.

"Which keyholes to pick?" smiled Thief. Attuned from the officer's meddling, Thief proceeded to throw the cellphone's keys into their correct keyholes.

With all of the locks picked, Thief put on his cape (which was, of course, emblazoned with a searing 'S') and was free.